Opps! Been awhile!

Okay, so I haven't written it what seems to be like, ages. I apologize. I'm sure you all forgive me. Anyways, nothing much new going on here. Still working in Salinas, living in Santa Cruz. I have barely gotten things done in my place. I've been heading to Coalinga every weekend to visit Ryan. Oh, and in case you didn't know, Ryan and I gave each other our Christmas gifts early. We put satellite radio in each others cars. It is great! I'm still enjoying this relationship and living life. I'm currently looking for a new job, as mine has never been permanent, and so they could possibly let me go this coming April. Wish me luck!

Well, I better get back to work. I'm also on myspace now, so if you want, you can check me out there as well. www.myspace.com/adxdaffodil all my blogs (except one) have been public, so you don't have to join to be able to read. The one you can't read, was a letter to Ryan....I'm sure you understand!

Miss you all much......J

Point to Ponder

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.
He said, "My son, the battle is between 2 wolves.
"One is Evil. It is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego.
The other is God. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.
"The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf wins?"The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

I couldn't of said it better myself...

THE LAW IS THE LAW

So if the US government determines that it is against the law for the words "under God" to be on our money, then, so be it. And if government decides that the "Ten Commandments" are not to be used in or on a government installation, then, so be it. I say, "so be it," because I would like to be a law abiding US citizen. I say, "so be it," because I would like to think that smarter people than I are in positions to make good decisions. I would like to think that those people have the American public's best interests at heart. BUT, YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE I'D LIKE?Since we can't pray to God, can't Trust in God and cannot post His Commandments in Government buildings, I don't believe the Government and its employees should participate in the Easter and Christmas celebrations which honor the God that our government is eliminating from many facets of American life. I'd like my mail delivered on Christmas, Good Friday, Thanksgiving & Easter. After all, it's just another day. I'd like the "US Supreme Court to be in session on Christmas, Good Friday, Thanksgiving & Easter as well as Sundays." After all, it's just another day. I'd like the Senate and the House of Representatives to not have to worry about getting home for the "Christmas Break." After all it's just another day. I'm thinking that a lot of my taxpayer dollars could be saved, if all government offices & services would work on Christmas, Good Friday & Easter. It shouldn't cost any overtime since those would be just like any other day of the week to a government that is trying to be "politically correct." In fact....I think that our government should work on Sundays (initially set aside for worshipping God...) because, after all, our government says that it should be just another day....What do you all think????

If this idea gets to enough people, maybe our elected officials will stop giving in to the "minority opinions" and begin, once again, to represent the "majority" of ALL of the American people.

SO BE IT...........

I WAS APPROVED!!!!!!!!

Okay, so as most of you know, I was in the process of buying a house here in Santa Cruz, well, I was approved for the open at 2pm on Saturday, October 15, 2005. Pretty much almost EXACTLY a year from when my parents and I were approved to buy a place here. I am soooo excited! Ryan and I spent the night there last night, and did a few improvements that we wanted to do. It is going to be slow, as I have Grand Chapter (OES State Convention) from Tuesday evening through Saturday evening. Then, I go home Saturday, sleep at home Sat & Sun night, then go to work on Monday, then Monday evening I need to check into a hotel in Sacramento as I am going to training (at the last minute) up there for work from Tuesday-Thursday. I think I might end up taking Friday off from work, as I will not be getting out of there until 5pm and then FINALLY heading out of the area, so I might just go down to Coalinga. Anyways, it is going to be a long process. I will start posting photo's of all the work we do. Okay, off for the night. Need to get some sleep, if I can, I'm still so excited, and I'm sure you can understand why!

We (Ryan and I) went with some friends to Disneyland this last weekend. We had a blast! I also got to meet his oldest brother and sister-in-law. They were awesome and I had such a good time meeting them. Can't wait to hang out with them again. Such a good time! 

Our second day at the park with everyone.....we had a blast, but we were really tired! 

Me, trying to get some more sleep before we left....we did Build a Bear after Disneyland, Ryan built me a flamingo in an Air Force uniform.....his name is Colonel Flam.....what an awesome boyfriend I have! Love ya babe! 

Ryan got an aviator hat with mickey ears...he loves it, can't you tell?! What a cutie! Gotta love him! 

Ray, Cassie and Chelsey waiting to go on Splash Mountain.....no, Ray is not doing sign language, he is just being silly..... 

Ahhh, the love of my life.....he is so awesome! 

Aren't we cute? Damn, I love his smile! 

Ryan's favorite shot I took, all 6 Thunderbirds in formation, flying right over us. It is a great shot, and I'm glad I got it. Had a blast at the Air Show with the love of my life......he can't wait to join the Air Force, and hopefully become a pilot. Please keep him in your thoughts as he applies, it has been a dream, and I hope he gets it, but alas, we both know, that God will do with him, what he sees fit. 

Aren't they awesome?! 

Thunderbirds in action! 

My friend Amanda got married this weekend and Ryan and I drove up there. She was gorgeous in her dress, and her wedding was awesome! I hope to have one as nice as hers someday! 

A Riddle

Schwarzenegger has a big one.
Michael J. Fox has a small one.
Madonna doesn't have one.
The Pope has one but doesn't use his.
Clinton uses his all the time.
Mickey Mouse has an unusual one.
Liberace never used his on women.
Jerry Seinfeld is very, very proud of his.
Cher claims that she took on 3.
We never saw Lucy use Desi's.
What is it?

THERE IS STILL HOPE!!!

Okay, so yeah, I don't have a chance, and I know it, but it still fun to wish......Kenny Chesney and Renee Zellweger split! Yeah! My man is going to come and marry me! Alright, alright, yes, I'm in love with Ryan, and yes, I do hope to marry him one day, but a girl has to have dreams! LOL! Hope all is well with everyone out there in cyber world.

Me and the love of my life here in the park a few weekends ago! He helped work a dinner we put on. You can't help but love him! 

Ryan and I at the OES reception that I presided over. He is the sweetest thing ever! I love him dearly! 

Like the Rain (Clint Black/Hayden Nicholas)

I never liked the rain until I walked through it with you
Every thunder cloud that came was one more I might not get through
On the darkest day there’s always light and now I see it too
But I never liked the rain until I walked through it with you
I hear it falling in the night and filling up my mind
All the heaven’s rivers come to light and I see it all unwind
I hear it talking through the trees and on the window pane
And when I hear it I just can’t believe I never liked the rain

Like the rain I have fallen for you and I know just why you
Liked the rain always calling for you I’m falling for you now
Just like the rain

When the cloud is rolling over thunder striking me
It’s as bright as lightening and I wonder why I couldn’t see
That it’s always good and when the flood is gone we still remain
Guess I’ve known all along I just belong here with you falling

Like the rain I have fallen for you and I know just why you
Liked the rain always calling for you, I’m falling for you now
Just like the rain I have fallen for you
I’m falling for you know just like the rain

And when the night falls on our better days
And we’re looking to the sky
For the winds to take us high above the plains
I know that we’ll find better ways to look into the eye
Of the storms that will be calling
Forever we’ll be falling

Like the rain I have fallen for you, and I know just why you
Like the rain always calling for you, I’m falling for you now just
Like the rain I have fallen for you and I know just why you
Like the rain always calling for you, I’m falling for you now just
Like the rain I have fallen for you and I know just why you
Like the rain always calling for you, I’m falling for you now just
Like the rain
Like the rain
Like the rain
Like the rain
Like the rain
Like the rain

Great Weekend

Okay, so I had an absolutely AWESOME weekend! My parents didn't drive me nuts either!

So, here is what happened. I went to Fresno on Friday, to go and see my occup. therapist (as I injured my back at work, and the pain med's were not working, and so I got one for bed, one for the day, plus VICODIN!!!! SWEET!) Okay, so I haven't taken the V, and I really don't plan on it either. Anyways, so, my back hurt some this weekend, but it was cool, as Ryan came out for the weekend and spent time with me and my folks. Plus, all my neighbors (and second parents basically) totally grilled him, and he was so good about it. They all approve (he passed with flying colors!). Anyways, we went to our section party (our park is split up in 5 sections and once a year on the same day the park has a section party so you get to know the people in your area) so we went to the Section 1 party and it was really nice. It is held on my street (where I bought MY house) and my front porch is the party porch and it is where they make the margaritas! So, next year, I am in charge of them, and I make a mean one, so I don't mind. So we all had a great time. I was sad to see Ryan leave this afternoon, but he had to go home so he could go to work this week. Lucky me, he is coming back out on Friday, and staying the weekend. Then we are both heading back to the valley on Monday, as I have a meeting in Visalia, and then I'm staying the whole week out there in the heat (oh joy). I have a few meetings and then this really big event for Eastern Star.

Alrighty, gotta get ready for work tomorrow, and take my med's in like an hour.....mmmmmm they are good. Hope everyone is doing well. Look for pictures of the alumni reunion we had a few weeks ago on here tomorrow. Nite.

Hallmark Adds A Dysfunctional Section

Sample card selections:

I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love.
And now that you've come into my life...
(Inside) I've changed my mind.

I must admit, you brought religion into my life....
(Inside) I never believed in Hell until I met you.

As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....
(Inside) That you're not here to ruin it for me.

Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go....
(Inside) Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably need it again.

Someday I hope to marry...
(Inside) Someone other than you.

Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....
(Inside) Almost lifelike!

When we were together, you said you'd die for me...
(Inside) Now that we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.

We've been friends for a very long time...
(Inside) What do you say we stop?

I'm so miserable without you...
(Inside) It's almost like you're still here.

Congratulations on your new bundle of joy....
(Inside) Did you ever find out who the father was?

You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket...(Inside) I'd miss you terribly and think of you often.

Your friends and I wanted to do something really special for your birthday...
(Inside) So we're having you put to sleep.

Happy Birthday
(Inside) Uncle Dad!
(Available only in Arkansas, Alabama, Mississippi and West Virginia)

Looking back over the years we've been together, I can't help but wonder...
(Inside) What was I thinking?

Congratulations on your wedding day!...
(Inside) Too bad no one likes your husband.

How do you?

How do you help someone who is having a bad day, to have a better one? Like, if I could, I would go and give this person a big hug, but I can't, as I'm too far away. So, what can I do? Does anyone have any ideas? Any would be greatly appreciated.

I'm better...

.....I talked my issue over with the person that I had it with, and am feeling much better. Its always good to get that out in the air. No need to bottle it up, as it only hurts you, and not the other person. So, how has your day been?

I'm sad....

.....yeah, so it was bound to happen. I have been on such a high lately that I knew I would have to crash sooner or later, and it came sooner than I really wanted it to. I would tell you why, but I just don't feel like discussing it right now. I need to figure out how to work through this on my own.......I wouldn't mind having jokes, or funny stories posted though, I could use some cheering up.

Reunion

Had the ADX reunion last night. IT WAS AWESOME! I met some really amazing women, that I only wish I could of known them as actives. I can't wait to see them next year. I'm hoping to keep in contact with them, so that next year, we have a lot to talk about. They were all so amazing. I'll be posting our group photo on here later. I left my camera in Coalinga I think, as I can't seem to find it right now. As soon as I do, you'll get to see the photo. I'm only sorry that more people weren't able to come, we had a blast!

Too Sweet...

My sister is starting to go back to church, which is a big YEAH GOD! Well, she takes my niece as well, and my niece (who is 4) went to Vacation Bible School this last week. Well, apparently just recently she had a bad dream, and told her mom about it the next morning. She said "Mom, I had a bad dream last night, but instead of getting up to come and see you, I stayed in bed and concentrated real hard on Jesus, and I felt better!" Isn't that the greatest thing ever to hear?! It just made my heart melt! I love that kid! If only more of us would remember to be as innocent as children, maybe we could learn something......its worth a try, isn't it?

Death...

I forgot to mention, a member of my chapter of Eastern Star died from a massive heart attack on Sunday evening. He was around 57? I got the phone call at work yesterday. It is still kind of a shock. I think I hurt the most for his daughter, who will never be able to walk down the aisle with her dad at her wedding.....

Please keep the Sorge Family in your prayers....

Advil "My new best friend"

So, I did something REALLY stupid. As you all pretty much know, I can be kinda stubborn. Okay, not kinda, I'm flat out stubborn. I'm really bad at it, when guys are always trying to lift things for me. My thinking is, is that God gave me arms, I can lift it myself. I'm not helpless. So, last Thursday, I finished moving a laptop and computer moniter into my old boss' office. Well, I lifted with my legs, for the most part, and then all of a sudden I felt it in my back, and ended up setting it down with my back. NOT A SMART MOVE! So, now I'm in pain. A lot of pain. It bites the big one. And I had to fill out paperwork yesterday because I injuried myself on the job. So, this coming Thursday I have an appointment to see an Occupational Therapist to check out my injury. I'm sure they will just tell me to take some Advil for awhile, as they have before, but I would rather them just fix it! AHHHH, this bites. Oh well, I was stupid, and I need to remember not to do it again. Doubt I will though....

Somethings wrong...

...ummmm, so I don't know if I should be worried or not, but everytime I look in the mirror, I see this big grin on my face?!

I can't even begin to tell everyone how happy I am. All I can say is, thank you to Ryan for putting it there. *smile*

BTW

I forgot to tell you the best part of the weekend. Ryan and I have started seeing each other. The Lord has truely blessed me by bringing him back into my life. He is wonderful, and I can't wait to see him again next weekend. *smile*

Pork Chops and Pepsi

So, I gotta tell you. First off, don't try to be slick in front of me and hold a can of Pepsi in your mouth and drink the last of it down. It won't work, as I did that this weekend to Ryan, and didn't know he was trying to finish it, and instead, he flinches and ends up spilling the rest of it down his shirt. Trust me, it was FUNNY! I felt bad, for like a second, but got over it pretty quick.

Now, as far as Pork Chops go. First, don't sit there and argue with someone over how bad people drive in Fresno. If you have every driven in Fresno, you know what I mean, and it is just a waste of breath! Well, Rollin (Ryan's twin brother) just wouldn't get a clue, and Ryan kept telling him to just stop arguing, that it wasn't worth it. Well, he kept going and because he talks with his hands, he flung his pork chop down (towards 2 hungry dogs) and they stole a bite off of it! And to top it off, he got UPSET? We all were like HELLO?? You put it in reach of DOGS! What were they supposed to do? Wait and ask for permission or see if you say "simon says?" Give me a break!

Okay, so yeah, it was a very fun weekend. If you want give me a call, and I'll tell you about these two things, trust me, it is funnier to hear then it is to read about! I'm still crying......

Sometimes you just gotta....

Breakaway"

Intro
Da da da n da da
Da da da n da da
Da da da n da da da da da
Da da da n da da
Da da da n da da
Da da da n da da da da da

Grew up in a small town And when the rain would fall down
I'd just stare out my window
Dreaming of what could be And if I'd end up happy
I would pray
Trying hard to reach out But when I tried to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here But something felt so wrong here
So I'd pray, I could break away

CHORUS
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly.
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky.
Make a wish, take a chance, Make a change, and break away.
Out of the darkness and into the sun.
But I won't forget all the ones that I love
I'll take a risk, take a chance, Make a change, and break away
(repeat intro once)

Wanna feel the warm breeze Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get onboard a fast train Travel on a jet plane
Far away And break away

(REPEAT CHORUS)

Bridge:
Buildings with a hundred floors, Swinging 'round revolving doors
Maybe I don't know where they'll take me But
I gotta keep movin on, movin on, Fly away, Break away
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly.
Though it's not easy to tell you goodbye
Take a risk, take a chance, Make a change, and break away.
Out of the darkness & into the sun But I won't forget the place I come from
I gotta take a risk, take a chance, Make a change, and
break away

Blueberries....

....that's what my toes look like right now. Yep, blueberries. Yesterday, I called the nail shop, because I wanted to get my nails done before I go out of town this weekend. Well, they only had the one opening, so I left work early and took the rest of the day off (which was so nice to do) and got my nails done and did some other shopping for my house and got a new cell phone as mine was acting funny. But anyways, yeah, I had my toes painted this really dark blue, like Cobalt blue, it looked really awesome in the bottle, and since when am I the type of person to go and get something normal? So, the guy (yeah guy, and he is awesome) started painting my toes, and I was like, I look like a blueberry! And he started laughing and said it reminding him of Violet in Willy Wonka and how she turned blue. I was like, thanks, I appreciate that! And we both just laughed. He then had to smack me in the leg though too because I kept almost falling asleep as I haven't been getting enough sleep lately, I guess maybe being on the phone late, and still really not eating (I have like half a sandwich a day, and that's it. I'm coming down from all my stress, soon I'll be eating again, I hope.) so I think that is effecting my sleep as well. Well anyways. Maybe tonight when I get home from work, or that is school, as I have a class to go to, I'll take a picture of my toes and post it up here for you all to see what I am talking about? Hmmmm. That's an idea.

Don't Worry.....I'm Happy!

I must tell all of you out there, who have been worried about me lately, and my battle with depression, you don't have to worry. I'm so happy in my life right now. I can't stop smiling. My negative attitude is gone (well, not while I'm driving) and I couldn't be happier with where my life is right now. I swear, the next time you see me, you will think I'm on drugs, but I'm actually just high on life right now! It's great! *Smile*

Even better news....

....I'm talking to someone who would never talk to me in high school. Come to find out he actually liked me from the first day he saw me when I first started at Lemoore High School. It has been a really fun week of talking, and I think I am going to go down and visit him next weekend, but I still need to check my schedule, so I'll let you know what happens. But just to let you know, he has been a complete gentleman to me, and so sweet. Hopefully I can make it down there. Anyways, better get offline for the night. It is getting late, and I have been stressed about my recent purchase and didn't eat for 2 days. Well, I'll post more later......night. *smile*

So, I have some news, I just bought my first piece of property! I bought a cabin here in the park where I am currently living in my parents cabin! I can't wait to move it! Unfortunatly it won't be till October, but that is okay, it is worth the wait! I'm sooooo excited! I can't wait for people to come out for a visit! 

it's small, but it has hydrangea's and daffodil's all around it....my favorite flowers! =) 

I'm soooo excited! 

isn't it cute? 

Couldn't of said it better myself...

A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience,
raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy is this glass of
water?" Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g. The
lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It
depends on how long you try to hold It.""If I hold it for a minute,
that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache
in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an
ambulance. In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I
hold it, the heavier it becomes"He continued, "And that's the
way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the
time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy,
we won't be able to carry on. As with the glass ofwater, you have
to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When
we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.""So, before you
return home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don't carry it
home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're
carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can"
"Relax; pick them up later after you've rested. Life is short. Enjoy it!

And then he shared some ways of dealing with the burdens of life:

*Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're
the statue.
*Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to
eat them.
* Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the
middle of it.
*Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their
maker.
*If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
*If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was
probably worth it!
*It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a
warning to others.
*Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then
you won't have a leg to stand on.
*Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
*Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
*When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
*Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
*You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the
world to one person.
*Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
*We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty
and some are dull. Some have weird names, and all are different colors,
but they all have to live in the same box.
*A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
*Have an awesome day and know that someone has thought about you today..........

A cute joke...

Question: What is stranger than seeing a catfish?

Answer: Seeing a goldfish bowl!

This shade of blue is AWESOME! Just for all of you to know, most of these pictures I've gotten from an online group. Isn't this a place you would love to live? I would go there tomorrow if I could. 

I wonder how often wives have wanted to do this? 

Lindsay "jelly bean," Julie "daffodil," & Carrie "scooby-doo" smile for our official Alumni photo at Spring Banquet 04. I've posted this in honor of us making it a whole year and to celebrate our status as ADX Alum! 

Summer Vacation

So, Summer Vacation. That is something I no longer have. This is actually my first summer that I haven't had one. I graduated in May 04, and that whole summer I was working on finding a job. I now have that job, and it just seems weird not to have the summer off. I mean, I have to actually get up EARLY (5:15) to be out the door at 5:45 to be at work by 6:30 in the morning. I go in early, as the traffic is bad driving home to Santa Cruz, so I start early and I get off early (3pm) or I can stay late and earn credit hours to use at a later time, and be able to take off when I want. It is pretty nice. So, I guess that is okay, I guess I shouldn't complain.

So, I gotta ask, what are you doing for your summer vacation? Anything exciting? I want to live through you, so please, post what you did for fun, I'd love to know.

Well, I better get ready to go to work tomorrow. Ahh Monday morning! I have TONS of files on my desk, waiting for me to copy and then send back to my offices, so the farmers can get to work! Are you jealous yet? I didn't think so!

Fruit or Vegetable?

Okay, so most people know that a Tomato is in fact NOT a veggie, but actually a fruit! Well, I have a new one for you. Did you know that a Watermelon is actually a VEGETABLE and not a fruit! Yep, its true! A Watermelon is actually a veggie and is related to the cucumbers, pumpkins and squashes! So, go out, spread the knowledge you have learned, and educate the world!

Bad Day

So, I have had a really crappy day today. I'm really depressed (again, go figure) and asked someone to name a positive thing about me, about being friends with me, and I sent the email to them at 7am, at 1pm I called them on the phone because I still hadn't heard anything, and was told that they needed to think about it. WOW! That hurt! So, I left work early because I was so hurt, and cried on the way home. I've also realized that I sent a letter, like 2 or 3 pages long, about me to an alumni of my sorority that I have never met, but decided to introduce myself to her, and she hasn't replied to me (I sent it on like the 7th of July) and that kind of hurt as well.

So life is just not going good for me, and in case you were wondering, yes, I did think about committing suicide as I have many times before. Sad isn't it? Well, my day is crappy, how's yours?

Points to Ponder

With all the horrible things that have been going on in our world today, I feel like we need to stop and smell the roses and remember the good things, like laughter, so for all of you out there, I offer up these points to ponder and these funny little quotes. I hope you enjoy them...Julie

Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are
considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have
branches?

Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in" ..but it's only a
"penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes
you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

Why did we put man on the moon before we figured out it
would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when
babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a
hearing?

If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they
fire you?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put
money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do we choose from just two people for President and
fifty for Miss America?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're
going to see you naked anyway!

If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think
I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes
out!"

Who was the first one to look at an egg come out of a
chicken and say "That looks like some good eatin!?"

Why do toasters always have a setting that turns the toast
into a charcoal briquette?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

When your photo is taken for your driver's license, why do
they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by the police and asked
for your license, are you going to be smiling?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a
stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out
of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the
time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the
bathroom is?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all
fours? They're both dogs!

Why does Donald Duck wear a towel when gets out of the
shower/bath, but doesn't wear pants?

What do you call male ballerinas?

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?

If Wyle E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME
crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made
from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come
from morons?

Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have
the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the
hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's you know where?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he
gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks
his head out the window?

1. When I die, I want to die like my grandfather--who died peacefully
in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car."
--Author Unknown

2. Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a
headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and
"Keep away from children." --Author Unknown

3. "Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support
group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar."
--Drew Carey

4. "The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a
desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with
it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house."
--Jeff Foxworthy

5. "If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an
infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even
considering if there is a man on base." --Dave Barry

6. "Relationships are hard . It's like a full time job, and we
should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to
leave you, they should give you two weeks' notice. There should be
severance pay, the day before they leave you, they should have to find you
a temp." --Bob Ettinger

7. "My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the
lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to
teach you how to swim.'" --Paula Poundstone

8. "A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal
skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study:
"Duh." --Conan O'Brien

9. "Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway
through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God.... I could be eating a
slow learner." --Lynda Montgomery

10. "I think that's how Chicago got started. Bunch of people in New
York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just
isn't cold enough. Let's go west.'" --Richard Jeni

11. "If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators
would be dead." --Johnny Carson

12. "Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography."
--Paul Rodriguez

13. "My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty
and that's the law." --Jerry Seinfeld

14. "Remember in elementary school, you were told that in case of fire
you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to
tallest. What is the logic in that? What, do tall people burn slower?"
--Warren Hutcherson

15. "Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same."
--Oscar Wilde

16. "Suppose you were an idiot ... And suppose you were a member of
Congress... But I repeat myself." --Mark Twain

17. "Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least
they can find Afghanistan." --A. Whitney Brown

18. "You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a
look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought of
that!'" --Dave Barry

Oh, and I just found this story, that I thought would sure be a joy to share....enjoy!

This is allegedly a true story, and if it's not it should be. As Beth told
the story...

All methods have tricked me with their promises of easy, painless removal
the Epilady, the standard razor, the scissors, the Nair, the EpilStop, and now
The Wax.

My night began as any other normal weekday night. I came home from work,
fixed dinner for my son and we played for a while. I then had the thought
that would ring painfully in my mind for the next couple hours: maybe I
should use that wax in my medicine cabinet.

I set up my boy with a video and head to the site of my demise, um, I mean
bathroom. It was one of those cold wax kits. No melting a clump of hot
wax, you just rub the clear strips in your hand, peel them apart, press it on
your leg (or wherever) and ignore the frantically rising crescendo of
string instruments in the background. No muss, no fuss. How hard can this be? I
mean, I'm not the girly-est of girls but I'm mechanically inclined so
maybe I can figure out how this works. You'd think.

So I pull one of the thin strips out. It's two strips facing each other,
stuck together. I'm supposed to rub it in my hand to warm and soften the
wax (I'm guessing). I go one better: I pull out the hair dryer and heat the
SOB to ten thousand degrees. Cold wax, my foot. (Oh, how that phrase will
come back to haunt me.) I lay the strip across my thigh. I hold the skin around
it and pull. OK, so it wasn't the best feeling in the world, but it wasn't
bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am Sheera, fighter
of all wayward body hair and smooth skin extraordinaire!

With my next wax strip, I move north. After checking on the boy and
verifying that he was, in fact, becoming one with Bear and learning all
about smells, I sneak into the bathroom for The Ultimate Hair Fighting
Championship.

I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using the same
procedure, I then apply the wax strip across the right side on my bikini
line, covering the right half of my vagina and stretching up into the
inside of the right butt cheek. (Yeah, it was a long strip.) I inhale deeply. I
brace myself. RRRIIIIPPP!!!!

I'm blind! Blind from the pain! Vision returning. Oh crap. I've managed to
pull off half an inch of the strip. Another deep breath. And RIIIP!
Everything is swirly and tie-dyed? Do I hear crashing drums? OK, coming
back to normal again.

I want to see my trophy - my wax covered pelt that caused me so much
agony. I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold the
wax strip like an Olympic gold medallist. But why is there no hair on it?
Why is the wax mostly gone? Where could the wax go, if not on the strip?

Slowly, I eased my head down, my foot still perched on the toilet. I see
hair - the hair that should be on the strip. I touch. I feel. I am
touching wax. I look to the ceiling and silently shout "nooooooo!!" And realize I
have just begun living my own personal version of "The Tar Baby."

I peel my fingers off the softest, most sensitive part of my body that is
now covered in cold wax and matted hair, and make the next big mistake Up
until this point, you'll remember, I've had my foot on the toilet. I know
I need to move, to do something. So I put my foot down on the floor. And
then I hear the slamming of the cell door. Vagina? Sealed shut. Butt? Sealed
shut.

A little voice in my head says "I hope you don't have to go to the bathroom
anytime soon. Your head just might pop off." I penguin walk around the bathroom
trying desperately to figure out what I should do next. Hot water! Hot
water melts wax! I'll run the hottest water I can stand and get in - the wax
should melt and I can gently wipe it away, right? Wrong.

I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than is used to torture
prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment. And I sit. Now the only
thing worse than having your goodies glued together is having them glued
together and then glued to the bottom of a tub. In scalding hot water.
Which, by the way, does not melt the cold wax.

So now I'm stuck to the tub. I call my friend, C, because she once dropped
out of beauty school so surely she has some secret knowledge or trick to
get wax off skin. It's never good to start a conversation with "So my butt
and vagina are stuck to the tub." She doesn't have a trick. She does her
best to suppress laughter. She wants to know exactly where the wax is on
the butt - "Are we talking cheek or hole, here?" she asks. She isn't even
trying to hide the giggles now. I give her the run-down of the entire
night.

She tells me to call the number on the side of the box, but to have a good
cover story for where the wax actually is. "You know that if we were
working the help line at XX Wax Co. and somebody called with their entire crack
sealed shut we'd just put them on hold then record the conversation for
everyone we know. You're going to end up on a radio show or the internet
if you tell them the truth."

While we go through various solutions, I have resorted to scraping the wax
off with a razor. Boy, nothing feels better to the girly goodies than
covering them in wax, sticking them to a tub in super hot water and THEN
dry shaving the sticky wax off! In the middle of the conversation (which has
inexplicably turned to other subjects!) I find the little, beautiful
saving grace that is the lotion provided with wax to remove the excess. I rub
some in and start screaming "It's working! It's working!" I get hearty
congratulations from C and we hang up.

I successfully remove all the wax and notice, to my dismay, that the hair
is still there. So I shaved the damned stuff off. Hell, I was numb by that
point anyway. And then I put the box of wax back in my medicine cabinet.
Never know when a moustache might start to come in

Prayers

Hey there! I have a friend who is in need of prayers for guidence. She is currently the VBS director at her church, and she is really struggling. She has little help this year from members of her church and she is really starting to feel a little burned out. She has many things going on in her life next year, like reunions and stuff. She told her minister that she would not be able to do it next year, and he totally understood. Well, now that it is underway, she is starting to second guess herself. She isn't sure what the Lord is calling her to do, and she thinks she spoke too soon when she said she wouldn't do it again. She needs prayers, so I offer this one up;

Dear Lord,

I come to you to ask for help with a struggling friend. She is doing Your work, and helping to bring Your children closer to You. She needs help though. She feels as though she can not go on, as she gets little help from those she calls brothers and sisters in Christ. She does not know if she will have the strength to push through and direct the VBS at her church again next summer. She knows that she loves this job, but she isn't sure of herself, and if she will truely have the time and energy to do it again for another year. Please Lord, speak to her, tell her what path to take, she will listen. If you want her to do it again she will, if you feel that it is time for someone else to lead, she will take a step back and help in anyway she can, but please Lord, tell her as she is struggling with what to do.

In YOUR name, Amen.

How do I?

So, here is the situation. There is a gentleman I know who married a girl who was 7 months younger than me. They had a 34 year age difference. This girl basically came between this man and his wife, of over 25 years, and they split up. They didn't get a divorce, because she got really sick, and he stayed married to her, so she could keep her medical benefits, while she was battling cancer. Their divorce was actually final, and posted in the newspaper, under her obit! Tacky? I think so. But anyways, that was a few years back. He has since married this girl, and they had a baby last summer. Well, their son, I think it is, just died. He was only a year old. He got really sick, and died within a matter of days. No one really has any details about how and why, but there will be a graveside service on tuesday. I of course can not go, because it is such a long drive, and I don't have time that I can take off from work, plus I'm not sure how comfortable I would feel in attending, here is where the dilema comes in. I think what they did was awful (spliting up a marriage) and it just makes me sick to think, she married a guy who is like the same age as her father, actually, this guy is older than her father, and I just have a hard time being supportive (we belonged to the same organization together for a very long time) So, how do I feel sorry for them, or do I have to? I mean, I would not wish a death of a child, at any age, on anyone, but I just can't feel sorry for them, and I think that I should?! I mean, I don't agree with what they have done, so should I just not feel anything? I just don't know what to do?! I'm thinking that there is a good chance I might see them in September when I go out there. If I do, do I avoid them? Do I tell them I'm sorry for there loss? What do I do? I have a "so-called friend" who called me right away when she finally heard about what happened (she likes to gossip) and when I told her I already knew, she was upset that I didn't call her, and I told her I just didn't think about, plus, I just didn't feel it was my business to pass it around, because it might seem as though I was glad this happened to them, and I wasn't. I had no feelings. She then continued to say how she thinks it was an "omen" which I find hard to believe. I try to live by, and it is hard at times, but to just realize, I'm not judge and jury, only the big man upstairs is. So, if what they have done is wrong, well then, HE will deal with them in HIS way, and it is not for me to worry about. So, this just brings me back to, is it okay not to be upset? To really not feel anything? Not that I'm happy that it happened, but I'm not sad either, I'm just like, okay, it happened, now on with my life. Am I wrong?

Too funny!

Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight. They would have 5 years to breed the best fighting dog in the world and whichever side's dog won would be entitled to dominate the world.

Osama found the biggest, meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and bred them with the meanest Siberian wolves. They selected only the biggest and strongest puppy from the litter, and removed his siblings, which gave him all the milk.

After 5 years, they came up with the biggest, meanest dog the world had ever seen. Its cage needed steel bars that were 5 inches thick and nobody could get near it. When the day came for the dog fight, Bush showed up with a strange looking animal. It was a 9 foot long Dachshund. Everyone felt sorry for Bush because there was no way that this dog could possibly last 10 seconds with the Afghanistani dog.

When the cages were opened up, the Dachshund came out of it's cage, and slowly waddled over towards Osama's dog. Osama's dog snarled and leaped out of its cage and charged the American Dachshund---but when it got close enough to bite, the Dachshund opened its mouth and consumed Osama's dog in one bite.

There was nothing left of his dog at all. Osama came up to Bush, shaking his head in disbelief, We don't understand how this could have happened.
We had our best people working for 5 years with the meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and the biggest, meanest Siberian wolves.

That's nothing, said Bush.
We had Michael Jackson's plastic surgeons working for 5 years to make that alligator look like a wiener dog.

GOD BLESS AMERICA!

Returning a call

Okay, I guess I have finally figured out what my biggest pet peeve is. Actually, I think I have always known, I have just somehow forgotten, because it hasn't happened in a really long time. I can't stand it when you are on the phone, and someone says "I'll call you right back" and then they don't! Why bother saying it if you aren't going to do it? Seriously?! How much more effort would it take for you to just say "I'll call you back later" It wouldn't, and "later" can be anytime between 5 minutes to a whole day or two!

Okay, so what got me on this kick? Well, I was at work yesterday, and found out there was a chance that I was going to be going to our Modesto office to help out some. Well, they kept changing their minds, and finally they said they needed to go and talk to the lady I would be working with, to see if in fact, she really did need my help. They said they would call right back! Welp, you guessed it, they didn't. So, I went home and had to pack just in case, because I am now sitting here, it is the next day, and I still don't know if I am supposed to be going or not?! And, if you are asking, well, why don't you just call and ask, well, that's the problem, I get into work so early, that most people aren't in yet, they don't come in till about 8am or later, so I can't call them. Plus, why should I have to call them? They said they would call me back!

Alrighty, enough venting. I better go. I need to now find out if I'm still helping to plan a alumni reunion!

I hate being sick....

.....so, what is the one WORSE thing that can happen to someone in the summer time? Yep, you got it, getting sick. I went to work tuesday just fine as can be. Went to work Wednesday, and left by 11am. Thursday, could barely get out of bed, I had a horrible cough, a fever that was easily over 100, though I never checked, and a headache that could of brought bin laden to surrender! It was AWFUL! To top it off, I was starting my quilting classes on Thursday. So, I had to seriously do whatever it took to try and kick this thing in the butt so I could go, as it was the first day of class. I ended up going, couldn't wait to be back home, and go back to bed. I got up the next morning, went to work for a few hours and then came home early again. (Please realize, that though it may not seem like much, it really is, that I was able to go to work for a few hours, seeing how my commute is 45 mins one way!)

Well, today, I'm back at work, and I'm almost 100%! I've also lost 3 pounds from being sick! Woo Who! Okay, so it isn't the best way to lose weight, but hey, you gotta start somewhere! Oh, and I learned a breathing trick from our Yoga Instructor here in the park that I live in, and she said, it will help you to naturally cool your body, if you need water and you can't get to it, it will supress that thrist for it, or it will help you to not feel hungry! I'm going to try it out, and I'll let you know if it works. If anyone else wants to try it, let me know, and I'll post it on the blog for everyone to know how to do it.

Okay, off to actually do some work.......

This is just so peaceful. 

These colors are heavenly! 

Isn't this an awesome photo? 

Dream Big

Dream Big: (3.39)
Ryan Shupe and the Rubberband.

An' when you cry, be sure to dry your eyes,
'Cause better days are sure to come.
An' when you smile, be sure to smile wide,
An' don't let them know that they have won.
An' when you walk, walk with pride: don't show the hurt inside,
Because the pain sill soon be gone.

An' when you dream, dream big,
As big as the ocean, blue.
'Cause when you dream it might come true.
But when you dream, dream big.

An' when you laugh, be sure to laugh out loud,
'Cause it will carry all your cares away.
An' when you see, see the beauty all around and in yourself,
An' it will help you feel okay.
An' when you pray, pray for strength to help to carry on,
But when the troubles come your way.

An' when you dream, dream big,
As big as the ocean, blue.
'Cause when you dream it might come true.
But when you dream, dream big.

Instrumental break.
(Dream big.)
(Dream big.)

An' when you laugh, be sure, (Dream big.)
to laugh out loud,
'Cause it will carry all your cares away.
And when you see, see the beauty, (Dream big.)
all around and in yourself,
An' it will help you feel okay.
An' when you pray, pray for strength to help to carry on,
But when the troubles come your way.

An' when you dream, dream big,
As big as the ocean, blue.
'Cause when you dream it might come true.
An' when you dream, dream big.

Let Go & Let God

So, I feel like I am at a crossroad in my life. I have made a decision. I'm going to stop worrying about things I can't control, which of course, is easier said then done. I'm tired of worrying about my job, and where I am going to be next year, or ten years from now. Instead, I'm going to leave it in his hands, which is where it needs to be. I'm going to stop being so depressed about my relationship with the person I am dating. If it was meant to happen, then it will. It is hard to not know what is going to happen, and whether or not I will get married, have kids, and that white fence. I never thought about it when I was younger......actually I always thought I never would get married, because I wasn't popular, pretty, or liked very much. Now, I have friends who are completing this faze, and I feel a little left out, so, I have decided, Let Go & Let God.

I have figured out, that there are two things I can do to change my life. First, start having a more positive outlook on life. What does anyone get from being negative? Nothing. So, I am going to try and find the positive in each, and everyday. Second, I'm going to try and get my weight down. I have a 2 year deadline. What could that deadline be? Well, my 10 year high school reunion. I have gained 100 pounds since high school....actually, I think it is more like 120, and that just isn't cool.

So, that's what I am going to do. I can't control when/who/if I will get married, but I can focus on being happy with who I am, and the biggest thing I can do, to make me happy, is to work on the weight.

Okay, off to take a shower and weigh myself so I have a starting number to work with. I'll post my accomplishments on here for everyone to check on. Wish me luck!

Break from Fresno!

Well, as many of you know, I travel out to Fresno something like 2-4 times a month, if not more often. Well, tomorrow will be the last time I come out, for at least a month! I'm so happy! It gets really stressful doing all that driving. The break is very much needed...however, I will not be alone on the weekends....my parents will be coming out every weekend, which will be a little stressful as well, but oh well, I can at least escape and do some walking through the park. Plus, my parents have people coming out, so that will be a buffer.

Okay, off to watch a little tv......talk to ya'll later...

Ahhhhh refreshing! 

This is something that I get to see every day in the park! Isn't it awesome? I love when God paints like this!